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A Chama da Ascensão

A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e a verdade libertar-nos-á! Quando o Poder do Amor superar o Amor pelo Poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. Na verdade somos todos UM!

A Chama da Ascensão

A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e a verdade libertar-nos-á! Quando o Poder do Amor superar o Amor pelo Poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. Na verdade somos todos UM!

Why Avoidance Coping Can Be Unhealthy and How to Stop It ~ Jamie Logie.

chamavioleta, 19.07.19

5 Causes of Aggressive Behavior That Have Childhood Roots.

By Jamie Logie.

July 18, 2019. 

 

 

 

It’s natural to want to avoid anything uncomfortable, but this may lead you down a terrible path.

Part of what makes us human is that we can define our existence by two things: Gaining pleasure and avoiding pain. We want to avoid anything that takes us out of our comfort zonesand makes us feel uneasy. For solving problems – which you will undoubtedly face – avoidance coping is an unhealthy way to do it.
This article will look at what avoidance coping is, why it’s not effective at solving your problems, and how to stop it

 

What Is Avoidance Coping?

Whenever a person faces trauma, they deal with it in one of two different ways: either through approach coping or, as we’re looking at here – avoidance coping.
It’s hard to sum up what avoidance coping is, but we can look it at more like an orientation for how you cope. With avoidance coping, you are adopting a bunch of behaviors that allow you to distance yourself from any trauma. This can look like:
  • Distancing yourself from the issue either through diving more into your work or other activities
  • Minimizing the scope of the trauma and minimizing your feelings
  • Denial that anything is even happening to you
  • Addiction to help cope either through drugs, alcohol, or even overeating
  • Isolating yourself from people, oversleeping, and being withdrawn

Why Is This Happening?

Basically, what’s happening is a form of being an ostrich and burying your head in the sand. It’s a refusal to accept reality and current circumstances.
If you’re surrounded by people that care about you, they might also contribute to the avoidance coping. They may be a reminder – or constantly remind you – of whatever the problem is. This can cause you to further push away, isolate yourself, and refuse to approach the issue.
There can become a sense that if you ignore the problem, it will just go away which we all know is the furthest thing from the truth. It doesn’t even matter how big the issue or trauma is. Avoiding it creates the same problems, and the longer you let it go, the bigger it becomes.
This becomes dangerous because if you choose to ignore a small problem, it can snowball into something much bigger and unmanageable.
The thing with avoidance coping is it’s not always a bad thing. Using it helps to avoid stress in the moment and gives the ability to cope. This is ok every once in a while, but if you constantly do it, you will always depend on it never taking action – or accountability.
Over time, constantly coping with things through avoidance can lead to:
  • Emotional numbness which can cause relationship problems
  • A lack of awareness with how you are feeling
  • A lack of awareness with how you relate to the world
  • An inability to take appropriate action and the chance to heal

How Can You Stop Avoidance Coping?

On the one hand, a person using avoidance can cope – but only for the moment. Nothing gets solved like this, it does not resolve the trauma, and it can grow and fester even worse. It might seem like a quick fix, but it only gets worse, in the long run, causing more stress.

The first thing to look at is approach coping or active coping.

This involves changing your way of thinking about the stressor. If you look at every problem as having a solution, it can become easier to overcome. A trauma or stressor only has power over you if you allow it to. Knowing we can conquer it can create a powerful mindset that allows you to approach it head-on.
This cognitive coping is the first step as many of the problems we face are ones we’ve built up in our own minds. Your mind is like a muscle and you can train it to stop thinking in an overly negative way.

The next big thing is to come to grips with the idea that coping like this does not work.

The sooner you can realize this, the sooner you can make progress. Just by reading an article like this shows you are making the first steps. Gaining the information behind what avoidance coping is gives you power over it and can help you stop it.

Another big way to stop it is to recognize when you’re doing it.

Make a note every time you avoid coping with something and you’ll soon learn to nip it in the bud.
This is also a good time to use stress relief techniques such as meditation, yoga, and exercise. It’s not that you’ll be avoiding a problem, but you’ll put yourself into a calmer state to deal with it. Trying to deal with trauma with heightened stress is a recipe for disaster, and it’s better to go in calm and relaxed.

Final Thoughts

Avoidance coping is a natural thing and nothing to be ashamed of. It is important to recognize if it’s got out of control for you and needs to be addressed. The sooner you can stop this method of coping, the sooner you can take control of your life, emotions, and mental health.
This is difficult and does require some work. Learning to reframe your thoughts is the best place to start and can put you into a better headspace to cope. Another good idea is to remember to take small steps and not feel you have to deal with everything at once.
Start changing your behavior by taking small steps instead of thinking you have to overhaul yourself in one big swoop. Having an accountability partner is a great way to do this and will also help with your communication skills. When you’re able to communicate better, it can make this whole process much more manageable.
And as always, if this feels like something out of your control, talking to a professional is always the smart choice. This can help you approach the problem with a trained professional and is a true act of strength.
References:
 
 
About the Author: Jamie Logie

 Jamie Logie is a personal trainer, nutritionist, and health & wellness specialist. Jamie also studied sociology and psychology at Western University and has a counseling diploma from Heritage Baptist College. He has run a blog and top-rated podcast on iTunes called "Regained Wellness". Jamie is also a contributing writer for places like the Huffington Post, Thrive Global, LifeHack and has an Amazon #1 book called "Taking Back Your Health".




Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 
 
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5 Causes of Aggressive Behavior That Have Childhood Roots ~ Jamie Logie.

chamavioleta, 17.07.19

5 Causes of Aggressive Behavior That Have Childhood Roots.

By Jamie Logie.

July 17, 2019. 

 

 

 

Can aggressive behavior be because of an overreaction to certain situations, or does it have deeper roots?

When you look at all the violence that’s around us, it seems easy to put blame on it. We also might feel that it’s just our human nature to have aggressive behavior and there’s nothing that we can do about it.
It may also be thought of as an act of self-preservation, connected to our evolutionary biology, and important for our survival. But just because we can be aggressive doesn’t mean that we should. We can be calm and under control, so it shows we don’t have to be controlled by behavior that is violent.
Behavior like this never has a place, but it’s important to look at why it’s happening in the first place. If it’s a reaction to a stressful, or threatening situation that may explain some of it, but does it go deeper?
Looking at the causes of aggressive behavior can help to identify if it’s connected to childhood roots. Getting a better understanding of all this can help in dealing with this dangerous situation.

This article will look at 5 causes of aggressive behavior that may have childhood roots.

1. Imitation Of Daily Life & Environment For Aggressive Behavior

This might be one of the easiest causes to identify that has childhood roots. Children mimic what they see and if they are brought up in an aggressive – or violent – environment, this will have a serious impact on them.
The problem that happens is that this aggressive behavior can accidentally be encouraged without people being aware of it. If we ignore this behavior, it can signal to the child it’s ok and they will continue to act this way throughout their lives.
In worse situations, this behavior may have been encouraged at a young age and it’s cemented into them as a positive characteristic. The instinct to act this way continues into adulthood with the individual unable to understand why it’s become a part of them.

2. Poor Relationship Skills

Some people have had trouble developing proper relationship skills and this can cause them to lash out and get aggressive. It can all come down to being frustrated and not knowing how to handle this frustration. They may also feel overwhelmed in various relationships and it becomes their default setting.
We can trace this back to childhood and a lack of a nurturing environment. The individual may start to see people as threats instead of being able to connect with them. This behavior can easily be carried into the future creating more frustration as they may not understand why relationships can’t develop or be maintained.

3. Trouble Coping With Emotions

Everyone has trouble dealing with emotions at some point, but a well-adjusted person will have learned to cope. Different emotions can easily cause aggressive behavior whether it’s fear, guilt, jealousy, or sadness. When that person gets older, those same emotions can cause the aggressive outbursts as they have never learned how to manage their feelings.
Children cannot handle emotions and it needs to be taught and nurtured, so it doesn’t lead to destructive behavior. This can be even tougher for people with cognitive disorders, or having autism spectrum disorder, as childhood will be even more frustrating.
Besides not having the ability to cope with the frustration, they might not even know why they are feeling the way they do. They also may not even be able to describe the situation causing the frustration.

4. Socioeconomic Status

Whether it’s a child or an adult, certain socioeconomic circumstances can trigger stressors that might lead to behavior that’s aggressive. There can be many factors that cause this including feelings of oppression in the household because of unemployment, lack of financial stability, living situations, and education.
These conditions would affect adults in the household and this would trickle down to any children living there. The child could then carry this mindset into adulthood and those same stressors will again cause aggressive behavior.

5. Depression

Depression is often a cause of this negative behavior, but it might also have childhood roots. Research from 1998 shows that there is a close association between the quality of the child-parental relationship, aggression, and maternal depression.
The evidence also suggests that depressive symptoms in mothers who display negative, unsupportive, and withdrawn behaviors towards their offspring are less likely to develop secure attachments.
Depression in mothers can have a negative impact on children leading to their own depression that causes aggressive behavior. Then when those kids who are depressed have their own children, the cycle continues to repeat.
There are also studies that show a strong connection between depression and aggressive behavior in adolescent males. You can even look back a few years and predict this behavior before it happens. It goes back to looking at the offspring of depressed mothers. When the kids become young adults, they can begin to display this behavior at age 20.

Final Thoughts

There are many causes of aggressive behavior and it’s something that needs to be taken very seriously. It’s important to identify what is causing it, and sometimes it means looking back into the past.
Looking at a person’s childhood can give some insight into what may cause this behavior. From there, correcting it may be much more possible.
References:
 
About the Author: Jamie Logie

 Jamie Logie is a personal trainer, nutritionist, and health & wellness specialist. Jamie also studied sociology and psychology at Western University and has a counseling diploma from Heritage Baptist College. He has run a blog and top-rated podcast on iTunes called "Regained Wellness". Jamie is also a contributing writer for places like the Huffington Post, Thrive Global, LifeHack and has an Amazon #1 book called "Taking Back Your Health".




Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 
 
Free counters!

  geoglobe1